Friendship is the most vital part of one’s existence. If you’re without friends then you’ll be shunned from the community for being “bizarre”. Honestly, we need friends because in a world without allies, we’re powerless. We’ve already been defeated.
But not all friends deserve our company. If one person is sucking the energy of the entire circle single-handedly, you need to minimize your touch with them. I have had my fair share of toxic people in my circle, and I am proud to say that they’re not a part of my life anymore.
How do you determine a person’s toxicity? Here are the signs:
1. They have an inconsistent personality
They’re a personification of the famous line from a Katy Perry song: “You’re hot then you’re cold.” You don’t want somebody who’s personality fluctuations affect the entire circle. It’s hard and tiring to keep up with their changing personality.
2. They are always accompanied by negativity
Their sadness brings down the vibe of the entire circle. And in their absence, everyone else’s eyes light up. If you’ve observed it then you know what I am talking about. If you haven’t then you need to begin analysing your friend’s body language when someone else is absent from the group.
3. Their life is the melodramatic portrayal of television soaps
And they keep dragging you into the exaggerated narration of their life. Be it their love life or family matter; Game of Throne theories are less confusing than this.
4. They throw pity parties for themselves
When in an argument, if you try to put forth your points they’ll counteract by saying they’re the worst or they’ve been sick for days. In a nutshell, they play the victim card. Arguing with them emotionally exhausts you since you start questioning yourself and your sanity. In a nutshell, they gaslight you.
5. They talk too much
You never get a chance to put forward your views regarding a subject. And when you do, they talk about you until you shut up.
6. They judge too much and too often
They’ll pass judgement based on their principles and their ideals and will refuse to hear your side of the story.
7. They are way too stubborn for their good
They’re very uncompromising and won’t adapt their schedule to your plans. Unless you’re a nagging bag of poop with a zero-tolerance policy.
8. They are resentful
If they believe you to have wronged them, they wouldn’t stop until they have unleased their fire-power on you.
9. They’re pessimistic
Whenever you propose an idea, they will come forward with negative outcomes under the mask of always analysing both sides.
10. They are bullies
Toxic people tend to be huge bullies. And they continue to do so under the notion of bettering you. If you have someone who argues with you and targets you for petty reasons, you’ve found the bully. You don’t have to physically torment someone to be labelled a bully. You can be a verbal bully as well.
What do you do when you’ve found the toxic friend?
It’s simple: You let go. And letting go can be tough but you have to realise your self-worth. Firing toxic friends is easy if you prioritize your mental health over people-pleasing.