Masturbation is a healthy thing to do. Everybody knows that right? Google shows numerous results on how masturbation can help in depression, improving mood, to have a stronger libido and erections and above all to clean clogged up prostate and save you from prostate cancer. These are indeed true things about masturbation and many research papers can vouch for that but is it the complete picture? What about the aftereffects that one has to deal after a quick fapping session? Let’s look at 10 reasons why masturbation can ruin your life.
1. Masturbation vs Real Sex
Having sex with a woman is one thing and jacking off is another. Not just by how it actually looks and feels but how it affects our brain. Oxytocin is a hormone that helps in building up the intimacy between two people. It is also called “love hormone” or “cuddle hormone”.
It is believed that oxytocin is released in the body during hugging, skin contact and having an orgasm. The brain views oxytocin as a reactive hormone that is in response to social recognition and bonding. It helps to create trust between people. Oxytocin is released almost four times as much when you’re having sex as compared to a masturbation session.
That is not all. Masturbation lights up all the parts of the brain as drugs do. The addictions are similar in nature and it affects the workings of the brain.
2. Masturbation and Porn mess up the dopamine levels
Dopamine is a neurotransmitter (that means it is a chemical that is released by nerve cells to contact other nerve cells) and they play a significant role for a Reward system that our brain has.
Masturbation has a beginning-with-an-end-in-mind nature. Men do it because it feels good and while we thump our manly symbols we always know what is to come (no pun intended). When a person is on drugs or does gambling, eating, having sex and seeks approval the brain triggers the reward-motivation system that leaves us to do more of these things, and a lot of dopamine floods our brain during this process. Dopamine makes us feel like a king.
But that feeling doesn’t last long, does it? One has to go back and do it again to get that feel good feeling back and slowly one becomes addicted to it. The more we do the more our brain gets desensitized to the effects of dopamine and the craving keeps on building up to keep getting those orgasms.
3. Excessive Masturbation destroys Dopamine Receptors
Too much of anything overstimulates our brain and makes the dopamine do double the work. Our brain stops responding to dopamine as it normally does when it falls into an addiction. This causes “Downregulation” of the Dopamine Receptors.
The Dopamine Receptors detect the Dopamine and overstimulation makes the receptors to work more and soon they become less sensitive. This is known as “Desensitization”.
The way ejaculation works in real sex, where a woman’s vaginal movement squeezes in a rhythmic fashion causing the penis to get ready for ejaculation, is disrupted when a person masturbates while just watching a couple of naked girls doing their thing. Soon our brain becomes desensitized towards the naked skin and even the casual and normal sex that actors do in the porn. It stops the ease of satisfaction. This goes on to development of fetishes and kinkier likings. The brain hunts for even sexier, dirtier and nastier thing to get excited.
What is more serious is that soon this overstimulation causes dopamine receptors to slowly die, thus causing permanent damage to the brain.
4. The masturbation addiction kills your real sex life
Since the masturbation desensitizes the brain the feeling to get naked and have a steamy night with a girl becomes very bothersome. Everbody knows Hugh Hefner, but not everybody knows that, as described by a Playboy Bunny Izabella St. James, he used to do masturbation while watching porn after having sex with four girls. This was his requirement to achieve climax. Not a very pretty end to a wild sex dream life is it?
5. The feeling of being drained
There is a limit to how much dopamine our brain could produce. If we use it all up by jacking off, well you must have gotten my point, we end up feeling like jelly or a paper bag.
While we masturbate the excess release of dopamine triggers the release of epinephrine and along with norepinephrine and cortisol, our body gets into the fight-or-flight stress. This increases our heart rate, releases the glucose from its stored form and increases blood flow; this all becomes very taxing for the body to take. Imagine what does the repetitions of this process could do. We feel eventually literally spent up.
This decreases our productive mood significantly and body remains in lethargy and procrastination.
6. It can kill your self-confidence
Masturbation may be a solo act but people never leave the space that is in our head. They always remain somewhere at the back of the head and the feeling of getting caught always keeps us at the edge. Sex is not a taboo. Society respects it (at its own terms though) but fear is still around the masturbation. It seems unnatural to people and societal influence is bound to creep into the psyche of the individual. You may have sweet sex with your wife or partner in a quiet and private place but jacking off doesn’t require such planning. The lavatory is the usual place for all the action and to fear that someone just might see you doing something like this is depressing as hell.
On top of everything (seriously no pun intended) watching the other guy do all the fun with a hot girl in a porn, what we always wanted to do, is seriously a very sad situation to be in. In reality, it even stops a porn or masturbation addict to become socialize and make the real sex an actual thing.
7. Masturbation is perceived as pretty perverted
A girl once asked me “don’t you think sex is an intimate thing between a couple and it should remain like this?” I couldn’t tell what did she mean by that at first. But then watching porn became a thing of guilt for me. “Would I like it if people would watch me in my private moments?” Well I know it is a professional world, pornstars get paid for what they do and it is seen as a respectable job at least in The States. But no matter how much it has become more of a freedom of choice thing, sex is still a private act and its essence is in its the magical moments between two naked mingled bodies. It is not how hard and fast you can bang a girl (desensitization alert), rather it is about being one with a girl and become physically and emotionally attached.
That is the real satisfaction which jerking off on a computer screen could never replace.
8. The rise of guilt and shame
We can’t simply go and discuss with someone about how many times do we jerk off in a day. It is not a big deal to discuss with a friend who never judges you but this is the thing, the world judges you for doing masturbation and it would never leave the conscience.
Being like a captive in a prison of short-lived fantasy amidst the dark walls of fear of being found out is not somewhere you would like to be. This creates unwanted stress and it is something that is totally avoidable.
9. Excessive Masturbation kills your social life
A man is a social being, anthropology has said it, sociology has accepted it, and it is not something that we are totally unaware of. Meeting different people, choosing the right girl, asking her out for the date, spending lovely moments cuddling around your love, causes our brain to release dopamine because we like it and our brain want to make sure that we keep doing it.
An awesome dating life passes by and a masturbation addict could only see it slipping it out of its grasp (ok maybe be a little pun intended). Desensitisation of the brain stops us from socializing with people. Having conversations, meeting women, doing outdoor activities becomes a killing task for us. And why it shouldn’t be. What could actually beat the comfort of cool air-conditioned air in comfort of home and privacy and steamy porn? Well, there is a real life out there that feels tons better than just your hand. Go and feel the joy of discovering your sexuality with a woman of your dreams.
10. Little things of life don’t provide the equal amount of satisfaction like before
We do various things throughout the day and our brain keeps our interest piqued by releasing dopamine. When our dopamine receptors are abused they stop giving us satisfactory result when we do little things throughout the day. This may be a walk in the park or delight in the food or even feeding stray dogs or any animal for that matter if you like doing so.
Don’t let your habits control your life. Masturbation has several benefits but it needs supervision of your active conscience so it doesn’t affect your daily life or sexual or mental health. Doctors advise that masturbating without watching porn or imagining anything can actually help in problems such as premature ejaculation. Learning what triggers your ejaculation and knowing your climax point and learning how to walk down from it can help you in getting your sex life back. Abstinence is a good practice if you want a break from all of this. Addiction is the enemy. It is time to get your brain rewired in its natural setting.