My Story: She Is My Gem, From Not Knowing Anything About LGBT To Becoming A Person Sensitizing People Around Her

Arnab Nandy - Coming Out

I am so Gay Today ( literally and figuratively ) as I am no longer a criminal. While I pen down my message, it’s my sincere request to share this message hoping it reaches to folks who are struggling within and also to their families. Please do not hesitate in sharing. If you hesitate, I lose. We lose!

Sexuality is a part of your identity and not your identity. Everyone takes their own time to accept themselves thereafter its a journey of self-awareness and owning your personality traits. Two years ago I lived a life which was not letting me live like a free bird. The dual in my mind was strong enough to let me be unsure of who am I. Then started my journey of self-exploration through socializing with folks from the community and their life values and experiences helped me deal with this battle in my head. I came out to my dearest friend Nikhil on his Birthday and felt that I gain the honest trust by telling my true story. My life changed at the very moment. It felt as if a butterfly coming out of a cocoon. Soon I started coming out to my brothers I gained in college and their response was heart melting. My parents live in a conservative surrounding and didn’t want them to get hurt/taunted by other because of my sexuality. It was hurting me to keep this within but I don’t want to be that selfish thus I took time and the time was right I got the courage to let them know about my lifestyle. The reaction was not negative and I feel privileged. But the doubts were real in the lines of biological problems ( impotency, erectile dysfunction etc ) which the society claims to make a man less of man. They needed time and thus I waited to not come out in public to protect them.

Today as I entered my home mom and dad gave me a tight hug and said in their happy face “Congratulation Son now it’s legal” and I couldn’t help but let out tears of joy (I’m getting this sudden tear burst even while writing this). I learnt that my mother started sensitizing the folks around her. My Dad is a govt employee and this law was holding him back to fight for me in the fear of what such laws create in the mind of our parents. Today on this historic day 6/9 (what a damn day, brings back the college nostalgia of my obsession with the number 069 starting from the ID number which I got in college) my parents are so happy that she told me “Now go broadcast it” “Acha hai abhi koi ladhki ka rishta leke nahi aayega” (Good now that we won’t get marriage proposals of girls for you). She is my Gem <3 from not knowing anything about LGBT to becoming a person sensitizing people around her, I am proud of her :’-).


Now the next step is awareness so that we live in harmony along with our fellow Indians. We still have a very long way to go to reach a state where we see same-sex marriage in India. I hope to see Queer folks not trying to fit into heteronormativity and cherishing what they really are. We are not asking for sympathy but a safe and friendly place to live in harmony. Our lack of awareness, our assumptions, ignorance and phobias are killing our closeted friends. Let’s get to know about the LGBTQ community so that’s we don’t unintentionally be insensitive to our dear friends. Do share this if you think you learnt something and might help others in your feed.
I never wanted to spread gossip about my sexuality rather use it to sensitizing folks I am across in my life journey and I am really really grateful to you. Brodas from another Mother – Love you all, You don’t know how lucky I feel having u guys in my life. You guys elevated my spirit when I came out to you and made me realise I am so much more than being your Gay friend. My community family hugs and kisses to you all, we have come a long way.Special Note: Dear LGBTQ fellows, if you are facing any kind of challenge or need any guidance, please feel free to reach out to me. Call me on (+91-9561414873) or email me (arnab.bits@gmail.com), if you think that I may be of some help. You have got only one life. Live it well. Play it well. Don’t be afraid of anything or anyone.In the course of coming out this Quote from Sense 8, I relate little too much –
“What you are trying to seek is a well-defined answer which is already what you are expecting to hear.
But the answer is not that simple.” Who am I?Now this is my quote
“Truth Gives you Power!”
the Flamboyant Hooman – Arnab Nandy ( I am still that fellow who will annoy you with his lame jokes)

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